How to increase your focus by doing exactly what you want

You know those days when you have a to-do list a mile long, but you can't seem to muster up the focus to actually sit down and do it? Yeah, that happens to me often! I used to think it's because I wasn't smart enough or discplined enough to be successful. So I would just cram more and more stuff onto that list, thinking "now I absolutely have to focus and complete this to-do list!"

I'm sure you can guess what happened... I still could barely sit down and focus on what needed to be done.

Then I made this POWERFUL correlation: the more tasks I added to my to-do list, the more I felt like I was drowning in work, and the less I felt like sitting down to do it.

When I feel like I'm buried in work, I become angry and resentful. "It's not supposed to be this way," I think. And once I reach that mindset, work becomes impossible!

Then came winter storm Juno.

My first thought was "great, now I can do all the work I seem to never get to."

Then, 20 minutes later, "I can't focus!!!!!"

So, I threw in the towel. Not what you expected me to say right? Here's why:

Sometimes, we just need to play!

Most days we work, work, work; keeping our heads down and closed to awesome opportunities for joy and happiness. But what's all that work for if there's no pleasure at the end of the tunnel?

And when you're feeling stuck, don't wait for that end of the tunnel to come to you! Give yourself time to play now! I guarantee it will renew your batteries and rejuvenate your spirit! And that may be just what you need to get your work done!

So, needless to say, this week I chose to play in the snow with friends and go sledding instead of making my weekly Vlog. I hope you find time to play too!

How did you play on your snow day? Share your favorite snow day traditions and pictures on the blog!

Truth! You can't handle the truth!

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Do you ever feel like you're fooling yourself into believing your happy with the way things are in your life? Or make judgments of others to elevate yourself? Our brains have a funny way of tricking us into believing the BS we sometimes feed ourselves. Such as:

- I can't find anyone I like

- I don't know why I'm not getting healthier

- I'm stuck in a life I don't love

None of these things are true. But you tell yourself these false statments in order to avoid what you really need to do - speak your truth. Your Truth knows that you're not being honest with yourself about these issues. And if you were, the answers would come to you. You would know what you need to do to change it!

Satya, a part of yoga beyond the poses, encourages you to examine your truth and live it!

Watch this week's video as Elizabeth Guardia and I describe how you can find your truth and put it into action now!

{http://youtu.be/HCvIouqTk1U}

So, do you have a story of when you got in touch with your truth, and it changed your life? Well don't be greedy and keep that all to yourself! Share your strategies with the rest of us in the comments section or on the blog! 

Put more soul in your goals for 2015

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Now that the hype of New Year's is upon us, you will feel pressured into a New Year's resolution or goal of some kind. But the problem with that is if it doesn't come from your soul - the place of your truth and knowing - then it's not going to last long.

When you make resolutions from you head, that's just where they stay - in your head! Think about it. A goal of eating more vegetables, exercising more, or losing weight is not something you feel in your soul!

A re-soul-ution looks at the bigger picture: Who do you want to become? How do you want your life to look? Those are the questions that re-soul-utions are born out of!

How will you go all in and trust yourself with a re-soul-ution this year?

Watch this week's video to create your own re-soul-ution now!

{http://youtu.be/TW9jOssnP-g}

I've been receiving awesome feeback and questions from you guys to my inbox. But I'd love it even more if we can create a powerful conversation in the comments section of this video! Share your love there :) Pretty please!

How to make room for success in 2015

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Happy New Year's Eve! In a few hours we will all pull the curtain on 2014. While most people have already started looking forward to 2015, I urge you to first take time to reflect on 2014 in order to start 2015 from the best place possible.

What do I mean reflect?

- Reflect on your greatest accomplishments and times of growth.

- Reflect on what and who has served you well this year.

- And reflect on the things that didn't serve you as well.

Then... get rid of those things that didn't serve you!

You have to make room in your life for what you want by first getting rid of what you don't need!

How?

Watch this week's video on just how to get rid of want you don't need to make room for your best self and a life you love!

{http://youtu.be/E8i23COo1go}

Share your burning, burial, or candlelighting experience on the blog or comments section of this video! 

Thanks to ALL OF YOU for the best year to date! It is an extraordinary gift to live my dream by working with all of you!

Don't give into the giving

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It's week 4 of the Holiday Survival series, and if you're not feeling the holiday crunch by now, you're likely a hermit. Or you're completely balanced and have this whole thing figured out way better than I do! Either way, here we go... Giving. Seemingly the central ingredient in your holiday stew. But why? How did we get here? This can't really be what the holidays are about!

You're right, it's not! But we perpetuate the cycle by giving in to the giving.

The holidays are a time for us to appreciate and recognize the ones we love. Think about who you want to spend the holidays with - likely the people you care about most.

So how do you show them how much they mean to you? {insert ridiculously expensive mall purchase here}

No! Don't do it! Give your love instead!

But if that's not enough for your 6 year-old or partner, at least add a sweet note or card :)

Watch this week's video to learn to give love and give without expectation- the most authentic form of giving.

{http://youtu.be/7Qfu7i9okTA}

Going holiday shopping this weekend? Share how you got outside of your gift-giving box! Head on over to the blog to tell us how it went! Leave your comments, stories, and feedback there!

End Your Family Feuds

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Welcome back to the Holiday Survival Series! This week's video is centered on family. And if you have a family - or any close group of friends similar to one- you know that that holidays can bring a lot of challenges and awkward moments. If you're not careful, those awkward moments can lead to disappointment and strife for years to come.

This week's video gives you the tools your need to avoid disappointment, missed expectations, and displaced anger. Because that is a triad I'm not interested in experiencing!

Use these tools to guarantee a smoother holiday season and let "F" stand for family and not for feud.

Watch this week's video to unlock the key to feud-free family functions! Say that fast 3 times!

{http://youtu.be/wdawSSImFzc}

Attending any holiday parties or functions this week? Use these same skills in the office too! Coworkers are our "work family" and are prone to the same issues!

Thinking about using these tips? Don't think any longer- do it and write about it! Head on over to the blog to tell us how it went! Leave your comments, stories, and feedback there!

Unexpected lessons in gratefulness

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Happy Thanksgiving! Whether you're traveling around to see family or staying home to chow down, this week is a great time to slow down and get grateful! In the second week of the Holiday Survival Series, I get into the nitty gritty of gratefulness....and it's not what you're expecting!

Forget those basic lists of what you're grateful for, I want to know what makes you tick and who gets under your skin. Why? Because it's the things and people that unsettle us that serve as our greatest gift!

This week's video teaches you how to spot your greatest teachers, and what you can learn about yourself from them!

Watch this week's video to master the art of making friends your enemy and learning lessons of gratefulness from those unexpected teachers.

{http://youtu.be/6QZIMiIvmPc}

I hope you have a greatThanksgiving- wherever you may be! Stay present and grateful and enjoy this holiday!

How did you use these tips? Head on over to the blog to tell us how it went! Leave your comments, stories, and feedback there!

3 tips for Holiday Survival

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It's the most wonderful time of the year, right?! Cue the music and holiday jingles! But it doesn't always feel like the most wonderful time, does it? Something happens between the holiday's intended effect and how you actually feel.

Today’s video is intended to help you manage the little things that come up so that they don’t become big things that stop you from being present and getting the most out of this holiday season.

And since it's the first week in our Holiday Survival Series, there will be plenty more where this came from in the coming weeks!

Watch this week's video for 3 tips on family, food, and Holiday stress!

 [Watch: http://youtu.be/PQFXrN4sEsk]

I’m definitely looking forward to this first upcoming holiday-Thanksgiving- and will be using these tips myself to stay present enjoy the people around me!

How did you use these tips? Head on over to the blog to tell us how it went! Leave your comments, stories, and feedback there!

Achievement vs. Disappointment- You choose!

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Have you started the Deepak 21-day meditation series on the Energy of Attraction? Following this link to get signed up! It started on last week, so you’re not too far behind. Along with this challenge to meditate daily, I’m also challenging myself to a 6am wake up call to exercise. I know these daily habits will make me more effective and happy.

Have you ever tried to start a new habit, or had a goal you’re pursuing? Can you count on two hands the number of times you’ve made a goal…. but it fell through?

There’s no need to be ashamed of this, because we’ve all been there.

The real question is “why” – why do we all experience this? Why are we successful with some of our goals and things we set out to do, and not with others?

The answer is – there are many of reasons why! But here are few key reasons that separate goal achievement from goal disappointment:

[watch: http://youtu.be/g-fOnuVIGtY]

  • Pencil in your dreams- we make time for all sorts of less important things. Make sure you schedule time to work towards your personal dreams and goals
  • Don’t cancel on yourself- No one likes to be stood up, so quit doing it to yourself!
  • Strategize for success- Make a plan to ensure obstacles don’t stop you from working towards your goals
  • Sacrifice- If you’re trying to make room for something new in your life, then something needs to go! What are you going to get rid of?
  • Stop hoping- Saying “I sure hope it can find the time for my goal” is a sure bet that you won’t. Stop acting like you don’t have control over this. You do.

Watch this week's video to find out more details on increasing your success rate. Are you serious about a goal or a dream? Prove it to yourself by following these steps to ensure achievement of what you set out to do.

Ready to try it out? Head on over to the blog to tell us how it went! Leave your comments, stories, and feedback there!

3 Steps to better listening

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Do you know someone that you just can’t get through to? Where, no matter how you say it, it seems that the point never gets across? It’s like your perfectly clear message is in the bottle, floating across to the other side, and somewhere in the middle it just goes rogue and turns south?

It can feel like you and this person are speaking totally different languages.

Think about what we often do when we’re speaking with someone of a different language - we just speaking really loudly!!! Like they couldn’t hear you.

This is exactly what we do when we feel someone who should understand us doesn’t – we get frustrated, we yell, we even get angry. Gee, that’s the way to fix a poor communication, by communicating even worse!

Then what should you do? LISTEN!

[watch: http://youtu.be/CE4Xi_U0_rI]

Instead of trying to speak your language more loudly, listen to the other person’s language to really understand them.

What should you listen for?

  • Their style- Most people will automatically speak to you in their preferred style. Pay attention to their tone, volume, and accentuation to understand how they prefer to be spoken to.
  • Their need- What is the need they’re communicating. And if you can’t figure it out, ask!
  • Their suggestions- People usually know what they want and how to meet their needs. Listen for the suggestion in order to know what to do next.

There it is - 3 easy steps to listen better and communicate well! Ready to try it out? Head on over to the blog to tell us how it went! Leave your comments, stories, and feedback there!

Survival 101

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Ever have a moment when you feel you’re not going to make it out alive? The fear can be literal and imminent or a dramatic response to something less dangerous. But the fear still feels real!

Watch this week’s video to find out how I made it out of alive this weekend!

Why watch?

You can use these same techniques to “make it out alive” in stressful work situations, contentious relationships, and a visit with the in-laws!

[watch: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4EenrkXznMI]

Ever had to face your fear? What did you do to conquer it?

Find yourself living in a place of fear instead of love? How did you change it?

Remember sharing is caring in the comments sections of the video or blog.

Will you be Brave?

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I'm curious... Have you ever gone to someone for advice or feedback and felt they were just telling you what you wanted to hear? Or feel like they weren't even really listening to you at all and just agreeing for the sake of it?

Even our closest, most-trusted "go-to" people can give us sugar-coated feedback. But hey, they don't want to hurt our feelings! So cut them some slack, right?

In graduate school, I had a professor/mentor give me the most honest (and boderline confrontational) advice I had ever heard. I was complaining about someone and she basically said, "have you thought about how your actions impact the situation."

I was stunned and offended at first. I thought 'you're supposed to be on my side!' The immature child in me wanted to run for the hills and never return because of shame and embarrasment. This was my professor after all!

But what I did was sit there and actually think about what she said. She clearly saw something that I could not see. She said to me what no one else had yet cared enough to say. And the encounter changed my life and the way I relate to others.

Why am I telling you all this?

Because I want to give you the same gift. I want to have those tough conversations with you. I want to push you to be better. And sometimes it will hurt.

So this week I want to challenge you to be brave. When you come in to see me next, talk about the issue you've been neglecting to mention...the thing that's really nagging you. Ask for the feedback you know you need to make real change in your life. Be courageous enough to receive the feedback.

Or, if you've never come in before, take that leap to face the feedback you know you need to hear! Be brave!

{WATCH the video for my promise to you!}

Were YOU Brave? Share your comments and experience in the section below the video (on YouTube) or in the comments section on the Blog.

Are you just FAKING it?

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I often talk about connection as a central purpose in our lives. It’s the source of a lot of our happiness, self-worth, and shared human experience. However, what we do and how we try to connect can say a lot about our true intentions and motivations.

So what do I mean by that?

Think about a conversation you’ve had recently – we use storytelling as a way to connect, relate, and empathize with each other. Right?

Think about the kind of stories people tell you:

  • Do they use over sharing? Like telling you intimate details too soon for your relationship with them? Chances are this is a pseudo connection, and can actually push people away from you.
  • Are they comparing themselves to you or one-upping you? Sounds like they are motivated to build their own self-importance – which does not lead to a real connection!

True vulnerability uses healthy boundaries. It allows for the time to build trust and is held accountable by both parties involved. Who do you connect with like this?

{WATCH the video to find out if YOU fake it!}

Now, think about how you connect with others:

  • What kind of stories do you tell? Why do you tell them?
  • When you’re trying to really connect with someone, what do you do differently?

So, I challenge you to really consider your motivations and intentions behind what you share and how you try to connect.  Be more mindful of this in your next conversation. Find out what you do differently when you really want a genuine connection, and how it affects the connection you make.

Did you try it? Share your comments and experience in the section below the video (on YouTube) or in the comments section on the Blog.

Create the Best Weekend Ever!

Brittany Drozd
Brittany Drozd

What if I told you that you have all the power in the world to make yourself as happy as you want to be?

Chances are you wouldn’t believe me. That’s because our consumption-oriented and instant-gratification seeking culture tells us that we can buy happiness. And to some extent, it works! We are happier in the moment of making purchases and enjoying them shortly afterward. But this kind of happiness is fleeting.

The reason why these purchases make us happy is that we’re excited and engaged in the process of actually buying them. That’s the key- being and staying present!

Ever go to dinner with friends and realized the time has flown and it’s 3 hours later? Or been into a great book and realize you haven’t checked your phone in forever?! That means you’ve been present and stayed in the moment!

Matt Killingsworth, of Harvard University, gave a brilliant TED Talk in which he outlined his research on happiness. Killingsworth concluded, “We're often happiest when we're lost in the moment. And the flip side: The more our mind wanders, the less happy we can be.”

This is even true of activities we despise - like traffic. Killingsworth assessed that when commuters are more present and engaged in their commute, they are happier than when driving while talking on their phones, on social media, or reading emails. You make think you’re being productive, but you’re just making yourself unhappy!

So how do you stay present?

This super easy tactic is bound to make you more conscious and present: ask yourself, “Is my head in the same place my feet are in?” You have the opportunity to bring yourself back to the present moment by focusing your mind on what you’re currently doing.

Why does a wandering mind make us so unhappy?

When our minds wander, they typically go to a few common destinations:

-       What I wish I were doing

-       What I wish I had

-       And who I wish I was

The space that exists between where you’re at now (doing, have, are) and where you wish you were (doing, have, are) is cognitive dissonance.  The incongruence that exists in how we feel about ourselves can be very uncomfortable and disheartening. This is the juice of what makes us unhappy.

What can you do about?

The good news is that cognitive dissonance exists only in our minds. We give it life, so we can also lay it to rest. Here’s how to erase dissonance in your life:

-       Activity: Think about the purpose behind what you’re doing right now. Is your current activity bringing you closer to a goal? If it’s a means to a greater goal, can you reframe your thinking around the activity? How engaged are in what you’re doing right now?

-       Possessions: Do you have everything you need? If you’re reading this article, the answer is likely “yes.” Only once all of our basic needs are met do we have the mental capacity to consider self-development, fitness, and lifestyle. There will always be someone with more possessions than you, but if you have everything you need, can you find more gratitude for that? Make a list of 5 things you’re grateful for right now!

-      

Who You Are:

We all have areas of shame in our lives that we usually don’t speak about. Our job, money, family, body, etc. But often these thoughts get out of control when our minds wander and stretch beyond reality. We make conclusions about ourselves aren’t even close to reality. Change this by staying present!

Take your weekend to the next level by using this tools to be present and live happier right now!

Use the #BYBS hashtag in all pics and posts of a happier you!

Are You Really Satisfied?

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Are You Really Satisfied? If I asked you to rate how you feel about your life right now, how would you rate it? A solid 8 out of 10, or more like a 5 because it could really be better?

Why do I ask?

A Wall Street Journal article posed this question recently: “Are you a Satisficer of a Maximizer?” The researchers asked a series of questions to see if people were generally satisfied with what they have (job, possessions, lifestyle) or if they found themselves always searching for the next best thing.

Why is this important?

What the researchers found is that there is a significant gap in “happiness” between the Satisficers and Maximizers. And the Satisficers come out on top!

Surprised by these results? At first it may seem that they’re suggesting you lower your standards. But what the research really suggests is that you need more gratitude in your life!

Come over to the blog to watch the video for ways to get more grateful and become a Satisficer!

In the comments, I’d love to hear from you!

Have you ever felt overwhelming nagging to have something different – a car, a job? Or, if you’ve been about to get over that “next best thing” search and have a story to share, let us know!

3 Steps to Crush Control

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Control. It has such a harsh and negative ring to it, right? Yet it’s something we want in so many aspects of lives. We want control with our partners, in our careers, and over our dog. However, the things we do to gain control are not so good… yell, make demands, not listen to others.

So why do we do it then? FEAR.

Our need to control people and situations is based on our primitive fears that we will not have our basic needs met – including money, love, and acceptance.

How do you make this different? 

If control didn’t serve us well in some ways, we wouldn’t use it so often. Consider some of the ways in which control is useful – planning, making a schedule, and exercising discipline.

But when it doesn’t serve us well, we need to let go control without anxiety or worry.

How do you do let go? [watch the video]

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Use these 3 Steps to Crush Control in your life when it’s NOT needed:

  • Recite your intentions
  • Reality check yourself
  • Stay present

Don’t take my word for it! Check out the video for waaaay more tips and examples to let go of the things in your life that are holding you back from the life you want to live.

Let’s create a conversation in the comments section of this blog to share even more tips and success stories!

Ditch the Dissonance!

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Last week, we spoke about goals and how to create a 60-day plan in order to move you closer to where you want to be.  

Goals are a great thing, don’t get me wrong, but they can be tricky too!

 

Sometimes when we’re reviewing our goals, we can fall into the dreaded zone of getting down on ourselves for where we’re at right now. We want to skip over the hard work and just be there already!

 

I call that space between “where you’re at” and “where you want to be” cognitive dissonance.

 

So ditch the dissonance, and actually move forward towards your goals!

 

You can do this in 3 quick steps [watch the video for full description and action steps]:

  1. Use your goals to help, not hinder, your motivation!
  2. Pull up your big girl pants! Everyone started in a similar place, so take responsibility for creating your success.
  3. “Sweat equity is the best equity!” so get back to work!

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Success is so sweet because of the journey it took to get there. Don’t deny yourself that opportunity for hard work and big rewards.

 

Share your Sweat Equity moments in the comments section below! The best conversation starts here, where we can learn from each other.

 

Work with me to find out even more ways you can make positive changes for your life and get want you really want!

 

xo Brittany

Super Successful September!

Happy September!

September is my favorite month for a few reasons- perfect weather (warm days, cool nights), fall clothes and boots, and back to school time (renewed energy and focus).

And like the students, September is when I go back to school too! Who doesn’t let the reigns loose during the summer?! You stay out later, live in the moment, and are slightly less responsible.

But with Labor Day comes the next season and next chapter of your unique story. Make sure it tells the story you want - with achievements and successes you're proud of! This requires renewed focus, vision, and strategy to get to where we want to be!

I want you to have a super successful September with a 60-day plan.

What’s a 60-day plan? A simple, clear way to see your goals for success. All you need in your 60-Day Plan for Success:

- title (hint hint... 60-day plan!)

- dates of plan (*if you start today, it's 9/2-11/1)

- listed goals

- and action steps

Watch the video for more details on how to make your own 60-day plan today!

Watch: 

http://youtu.be/

qxk7KRbtxS8

What did you put on your 60-day plan? What action step will you take first? 

Let's start a conversation

in the comments section on this video or blog post!

4 Steps to Being Heard!

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Do you ever catch yourself saying this: "How many times do I have to say it?" Or "why can't you understand me?" Or better yet "am I speaking English?"

Communicating with others can be confusing and frustrating at best! Sometimes it seems that those closest to us have the most difficult time understanding what we're really saying. But who's really to blame - them or us?  

Great communication is the result of authenticity and love-based efforts to be heard! Are your speaking from a place of love or fear? Psssttt - have you ever not send what you really meant or wantd? Ever held back or held it in? That's fear.

Use these 4 components to say what you truly want, desire, and value to get your needs met!

1.    Observing: The concrete actions we are observing that are affecting

       our well-being

2.    Feelings: How we feel in relation to what we are observing

3.    Needs: The needs, values, desires, etc. that are creating our

       feelings

4.    Request: The concrete action we request in order to enrich our

       lives

Watch the video to see how it all plays out!

What component works best for you? When have you tried this and it actually worked? What's an example in which you can use this strategy that wasn't mentioned? Let's start a conversation in the comments section on this video or blog post!

Your Key to Happiness

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Ever look aimlessly for your keys and they're nowhere to be found?! Yeah, this is kind of like that. Frustrating, but so rewarding when you find them!

Ever look aimlessly for your keys and they're nowhere to be found?! Yeah, this is kind of like that. Frustrating, but so rewarding when you find them!

Everyone’s always looking for the key to happiness. Trying to find it in their career, their relationships, and other external things. But happiness has to come from within. 
This is good news for some and bad news for others: the good news is that if happiness comes from within, that means we’re all capable of having it. We’re all capable of being happy. The “bad” news that it comes from within, meaning that you’re going to have to look in the mirror and dig through the trenches to find it. 
Sometimes it’s hidden beneath the very things we’ve been trying to avoid and ignore in our lives. Sometimes it’s smack dab in the middle of us and our relationships with others. But no matter where happiness is hiding, we need to do the following things to find it…..  [watche the video]
Wach: http://youtu.be/JHfWMvZ1ONU
  1. Draw a map. Where was your happiness the last time you saw it? Where has it been in the past? At different stages of your life?
  2. Make a to do list based on the activities you were doing when you’ve been happier in the past. 
  3. Be aware! How are you acting during the day? What’s your mood like? How are you interacting with others? All of these things impact our happiness, and you will need to be aware of what you’re doing now if you’re going to change it.
  4. Give a damn! If you want to be happier, then you’re going to have to make an effort, engage, and care about YOU!
When has this worked for you? When have you been happier in your life? What's something you already know helps you feel happier? I CHALLENGE you to write one thing in the comments section that you will change TODAY to make room for more happiness!

I want to hear from YOU! Send me your questions, suggestions, and comments on what you want to see and hear from me on videos, blogs, and newsletters! I want to give you exactly what you need to be your best self!