3 tips for Holiday Survival

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It's the most wonderful time of the year, right?! Cue the music and holiday jingles! But it doesn't always feel like the most wonderful time, does it? Something happens between the holiday's intended effect and how you actually feel.

Today’s video is intended to help you manage the little things that come up so that they don’t become big things that stop you from being present and getting the most out of this holiday season.

And since it's the first week in our Holiday Survival Series, there will be plenty more where this came from in the coming weeks!

Watch this week's video for 3 tips on family, food, and Holiday stress!

 [Watch: http://youtu.be/PQFXrN4sEsk]

I’m definitely looking forward to this first upcoming holiday-Thanksgiving- and will be using these tips myself to stay present enjoy the people around me!

How did you use these tips? Head on over to the blog to tell us how it went! Leave your comments, stories, and feedback there!

Achievement vs. Disappointment- You choose!

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Have you started the Deepak 21-day meditation series on the Energy of Attraction? Following this link to get signed up! It started on last week, so you’re not too far behind. Along with this challenge to meditate daily, I’m also challenging myself to a 6am wake up call to exercise. I know these daily habits will make me more effective and happy.

Have you ever tried to start a new habit, or had a goal you’re pursuing? Can you count on two hands the number of times you’ve made a goal…. but it fell through?

There’s no need to be ashamed of this, because we’ve all been there.

The real question is “why” – why do we all experience this? Why are we successful with some of our goals and things we set out to do, and not with others?

The answer is – there are many of reasons why! But here are few key reasons that separate goal achievement from goal disappointment:

[watch: http://youtu.be/g-fOnuVIGtY]

  • Pencil in your dreams- we make time for all sorts of less important things. Make sure you schedule time to work towards your personal dreams and goals
  • Don’t cancel on yourself- No one likes to be stood up, so quit doing it to yourself!
  • Strategize for success- Make a plan to ensure obstacles don’t stop you from working towards your goals
  • Sacrifice- If you’re trying to make room for something new in your life, then something needs to go! What are you going to get rid of?
  • Stop hoping- Saying “I sure hope it can find the time for my goal” is a sure bet that you won’t. Stop acting like you don’t have control over this. You do.

Watch this week's video to find out more details on increasing your success rate. Are you serious about a goal or a dream? Prove it to yourself by following these steps to ensure achievement of what you set out to do.

Ready to try it out? Head on over to the blog to tell us how it went! Leave your comments, stories, and feedback there!

Are you really satisfied?

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If I asked you to rate how you feel about your life right now, how would you rate it? A solid 8 out of 10, or more like a 5 because it could really be better? Why do I ask?

A Wall Street Journal article posed this question recently: “Are you a Satisficer of a Maximizer?”

The researchers asked a series of questions to see if people were generally satisfied with what they have (job, possessions, lifestyle) or if they found themselves always searching for the next best thing.

Why is this important?

What the researchers found is that there is a significant gap in “happiness” between the Satisficers and Maximizers. And the Satisficers come out on top!

Surprised by these results? At first it may seem that they’re suggesting you lower your standards.  But what the research really suggests is that you need more gratitude in your life!

Come over to the blog to watch the video for ways to get more grateful and become a Satisficer!

[Watch the Video]

In the comments, I’d love to hear from you!

Have you ever felt overwhelming nagging to have something different – a car, a job? Or, if you’ve been about to get over that “next best thing” search and have a story to share, let us know!

Join us! 

Have you noticed to new pictures on the walls at my office? We're having a Gallery Night at the Therapy Collaborative on October 30th at 7pm. Join us to meet the photographer!

Create the Best Weekend Ever!

Brittany Drozd
Brittany Drozd

What if I told you that you have all the power in the world to make yourself as happy as you want to be?

Chances are you wouldn’t believe me. That’s because our consumption-oriented and instant-gratification seeking culture tells us that we can buy happiness. And to some extent, it works! We are happier in the moment of making purchases and enjoying them shortly afterward. But this kind of happiness is fleeting.

The reason why these purchases make us happy is that we’re excited and engaged in the process of actually buying them. That’s the key- being and staying present!

Ever go to dinner with friends and realized the time has flown and it’s 3 hours later? Or been into a great book and realize you haven’t checked your phone in forever?! That means you’ve been present and stayed in the moment!

Matt Killingsworth, of Harvard University, gave a brilliant TED Talk in which he outlined his research on happiness. Killingsworth concluded, “We're often happiest when we're lost in the moment. And the flip side: The more our mind wanders, the less happy we can be.”

This is even true of activities we despise - like traffic. Killingsworth assessed that when commuters are more present and engaged in their commute, they are happier than when driving while talking on their phones, on social media, or reading emails. You make think you’re being productive, but you’re just making yourself unhappy!

So how do you stay present?

This super easy tactic is bound to make you more conscious and present: ask yourself, “Is my head in the same place my feet are in?” You have the opportunity to bring yourself back to the present moment by focusing your mind on what you’re currently doing.

Why does a wandering mind make us so unhappy?

When our minds wander, they typically go to a few common destinations:

-       What I wish I were doing

-       What I wish I had

-       And who I wish I was

The space that exists between where you’re at now (doing, have, are) and where you wish you were (doing, have, are) is cognitive dissonance.  The incongruence that exists in how we feel about ourselves can be very uncomfortable and disheartening. This is the juice of what makes us unhappy.

What can you do about?

The good news is that cognitive dissonance exists only in our minds. We give it life, so we can also lay it to rest. Here’s how to erase dissonance in your life:

-       Activity: Think about the purpose behind what you’re doing right now. Is your current activity bringing you closer to a goal? If it’s a means to a greater goal, can you reframe your thinking around the activity? How engaged are in what you’re doing right now?

-       Possessions: Do you have everything you need? If you’re reading this article, the answer is likely “yes.” Only once all of our basic needs are met do we have the mental capacity to consider self-development, fitness, and lifestyle. There will always be someone with more possessions than you, but if you have everything you need, can you find more gratitude for that? Make a list of 5 things you’re grateful for right now!

-      

Who You Are:

We all have areas of shame in our lives that we usually don’t speak about. Our job, money, family, body, etc. But often these thoughts get out of control when our minds wander and stretch beyond reality. We make conclusions about ourselves aren’t even close to reality. Change this by staying present!

Take your weekend to the next level by using this tools to be present and live happier right now!

Use the #BYBS hashtag in all pics and posts of a happier you!

Will you be Brave?

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I'm curious... Have you ever gone to someone for advice or feedback and felt they were just telling you what you wanted to hear? Or feel like they weren't even really listening to you at all and just agreeing for the sake of it?

Even our closest, most-trusted "go-to" people can give us sugar-coated feedback. But hey, they don't want to hurt our feelings! So cut them some slack, right?

In graduate school, I had a professor/mentor give me the most honest (and boderline confrontational) advice I had ever heard. I was complaining about someone and she basically said, "have you thought about how your actions impact the situation."

I was stunned and offended at first. I thought 'you're supposed to be on my side!' The immature child in me wanted to run for the hills and never return because of shame and embarrasment. This was my professor after all!

But what I did was sit there and actually think about what she said. She clearly saw something that I could not see. She said to me what no one else had yet cared enough to say. And the encounter changed my life and the way I relate to others.

Why am I telling you all this?

Because I want to give you the same gift. I want to have those tough conversations with you. I want to push you to be better. And sometimes it will hurt.

So this week I want to challenge you to be brave. When you come in to see me next, talk about the issue you've been neglecting to mention...the thing that's really nagging you. Ask for the feedback you know you need to make real change in your life. Be courageous enough to receive the feedback.

Or, if you've never come in before, take that leap to face the feedback you know you need to hear! Be brave!

{WATCH the video for my promise to you!}

Were YOU Brave? Share your comments and experience in the section below the video (on YouTube) or in the comments section on the Blog.

Are you just FAKING it?

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I often talk about connection as a central purpose in our lives. It’s the source of a lot of our happiness, self-worth, and shared human experience. However, what we do and how we try to connect can say a lot about our true intentions and motivations.

So what do I mean by that?

Think about a conversation you’ve had recently – we use storytelling as a way to connect, relate, and empathize with each other. Right?

Think about the kind of stories people tell you:

  • Do they use over sharing? Like telling you intimate details too soon for your relationship with them? Chances are this is a pseudo connection, and can actually push people away from you.
  • Are they comparing themselves to you or one-upping you? Sounds like they are motivated to build their own self-importance – which does not lead to a real connection!

True vulnerability uses healthy boundaries. It allows for the time to build trust and is held accountable by both parties involved. Who do you connect with like this?

{WATCH the video to find out if YOU fake it!}

Now, think about how you connect with others:

  • What kind of stories do you tell? Why do you tell them?
  • When you’re trying to really connect with someone, what do you do differently?

So, I challenge you to really consider your motivations and intentions behind what you share and how you try to connect.  Be more mindful of this in your next conversation. Find out what you do differently when you really want a genuine connection, and how it affects the connection you make.

Did you try it? Share your comments and experience in the section below the video (on YouTube) or in the comments section on the Blog.

Are You Really Satisfied?

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Are You Really Satisfied? If I asked you to rate how you feel about your life right now, how would you rate it? A solid 8 out of 10, or more like a 5 because it could really be better?

Why do I ask?

A Wall Street Journal article posed this question recently: “Are you a Satisficer of a Maximizer?” The researchers asked a series of questions to see if people were generally satisfied with what they have (job, possessions, lifestyle) or if they found themselves always searching for the next best thing.

Why is this important?

What the researchers found is that there is a significant gap in “happiness” between the Satisficers and Maximizers. And the Satisficers come out on top!

Surprised by these results? At first it may seem that they’re suggesting you lower your standards. But what the research really suggests is that you need more gratitude in your life!

Come over to the blog to watch the video for ways to get more grateful and become a Satisficer!

In the comments, I’d love to hear from you!

Have you ever felt overwhelming nagging to have something different – a car, a job? Or, if you’ve been about to get over that “next best thing” search and have a story to share, let us know!

3 Steps to Crush Control

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Control. It has such a harsh and negative ring to it, right? Yet it’s something we want in so many aspects of lives. We want control with our partners, in our careers, and over our dog. However, the things we do to gain control are not so good… yell, make demands, not listen to others.

So why do we do it then? FEAR.

Our need to control people and situations is based on our primitive fears that we will not have our basic needs met – including money, love, and acceptance.

How do you make this different? 

If control didn’t serve us well in some ways, we wouldn’t use it so often. Consider some of the ways in which control is useful – planning, making a schedule, and exercising discipline.

But when it doesn’t serve us well, we need to let go control without anxiety or worry.

How do you do let go? [watch the video]

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Use these 3 Steps to Crush Control in your life when it’s NOT needed:

  • Recite your intentions
  • Reality check yourself
  • Stay present

Don’t take my word for it! Check out the video for waaaay more tips and examples to let go of the things in your life that are holding you back from the life you want to live.

Let’s create a conversation in the comments section of this blog to share even more tips and success stories!

Ditch the Dissonance!

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Last week, we spoke about goals and how to create a 60-day plan in order to move you closer to where you want to be.  

Goals are a great thing, don’t get me wrong, but they can be tricky too!

 

Sometimes when we’re reviewing our goals, we can fall into the dreaded zone of getting down on ourselves for where we’re at right now. We want to skip over the hard work and just be there already!

 

I call that space between “where you’re at” and “where you want to be” cognitive dissonance.

 

So ditch the dissonance, and actually move forward towards your goals!

 

You can do this in 3 quick steps [watch the video for full description and action steps]:

  1. Use your goals to help, not hinder, your motivation!
  2. Pull up your big girl pants! Everyone started in a similar place, so take responsibility for creating your success.
  3. “Sweat equity is the best equity!” so get back to work!

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Success is so sweet because of the journey it took to get there. Don’t deny yourself that opportunity for hard work and big rewards.

 

Share your Sweat Equity moments in the comments section below! The best conversation starts here, where we can learn from each other.

 

Work with me to find out even more ways you can make positive changes for your life and get want you really want!

 

xo Brittany

Super Successful September!

Happy September!

September is my favorite month for a few reasons- perfect weather (warm days, cool nights), fall clothes and boots, and back to school time (renewed energy and focus).

And like the students, September is when I go back to school too! Who doesn’t let the reigns loose during the summer?! You stay out later, live in the moment, and are slightly less responsible.

But with Labor Day comes the next season and next chapter of your unique story. Make sure it tells the story you want - with achievements and successes you're proud of! This requires renewed focus, vision, and strategy to get to where we want to be!

I want you to have a super successful September with a 60-day plan.

What’s a 60-day plan? A simple, clear way to see your goals for success. All you need in your 60-Day Plan for Success:

- title (hint hint... 60-day plan!)

- dates of plan (*if you start today, it's 9/2-11/1)

- listed goals

- and action steps

Watch the video for more details on how to make your own 60-day plan today!

Watch: 

http://youtu.be/

qxk7KRbtxS8

What did you put on your 60-day plan? What action step will you take first? 

Let's start a conversation

in the comments section on this video or blog post!

4 Steps to Being Heard!

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Do you ever catch yourself saying this: "How many times do I have to say it?" Or "why can't you understand me?" Or better yet "am I speaking English?"

Communicating with others can be confusing and frustrating at best! Sometimes it seems that those closest to us have the most difficult time understanding what we're really saying. But who's really to blame - them or us?  

Great communication is the result of authenticity and love-based efforts to be heard! Are your speaking from a place of love or fear? Psssttt - have you ever not send what you really meant or wantd? Ever held back or held it in? That's fear.

Use these 4 components to say what you truly want, desire, and value to get your needs met!

1.    Observing: The concrete actions we are observing that are affecting

       our well-being

2.    Feelings: How we feel in relation to what we are observing

3.    Needs: The needs, values, desires, etc. that are creating our

       feelings

4.    Request: The concrete action we request in order to enrich our

       lives

Watch the video to see how it all plays out!

What component works best for you? When have you tried this and it actually worked? What's an example in which you can use this strategy that wasn't mentioned? Let's start a conversation in the comments section on this video or blog post!

Your Key to Happiness

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Ever look aimlessly for your keys and they're nowhere to be found?! Yeah, this is kind of like that. Frustrating, but so rewarding when you find them!

Ever look aimlessly for your keys and they're nowhere to be found?! Yeah, this is kind of like that. Frustrating, but so rewarding when you find them!

Everyone’s always looking for the key to happiness. Trying to find it in their career, their relationships, and other external things. But happiness has to come from within. 
This is good news for some and bad news for others: the good news is that if happiness comes from within, that means we’re all capable of having it. We’re all capable of being happy. The “bad” news that it comes from within, meaning that you’re going to have to look in the mirror and dig through the trenches to find it. 
Sometimes it’s hidden beneath the very things we’ve been trying to avoid and ignore in our lives. Sometimes it’s smack dab in the middle of us and our relationships with others. But no matter where happiness is hiding, we need to do the following things to find it…..  [watche the video]
Wach: http://youtu.be/JHfWMvZ1ONU
  1. Draw a map. Where was your happiness the last time you saw it? Where has it been in the past? At different stages of your life?
  2. Make a to do list based on the activities you were doing when you’ve been happier in the past. 
  3. Be aware! How are you acting during the day? What’s your mood like? How are you interacting with others? All of these things impact our happiness, and you will need to be aware of what you’re doing now if you’re going to change it.
  4. Give a damn! If you want to be happier, then you’re going to have to make an effort, engage, and care about YOU!
When has this worked for you? When have you been happier in your life? What's something you already know helps you feel happier? I CHALLENGE you to write one thing in the comments section that you will change TODAY to make room for more happiness!

I want to hear from YOU! Send me your questions, suggestions, and comments on what you want to see and hear from me on videos, blogs, and newsletters! I want to give you exactly what you need to be your best self!

3 Ways to Better Relationships Today

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How many people have you already spoken to this morning? How many of those people would you consider an essesntial relationship to your life? And how many of those conversations could have gone better?

It is a basic human need to be part of a group or something bigger than ourselves. That is why we form these relationships. Although we hate to admit it, we need support from others at times as well. And in some ways, the connections we form with other people provide the greatest gifts in life!

So taking care of these relationships is essential! 

Here are 3 ways you can improve the most important relationships in your life, and likely improve yourself as well: 

  • Ask yourself "What's my desired outcome?" or "What do I want to happen?" to get closer to your personal motivations.
  • Be Brave! Share your true self, desires, and needs to further close the communication gap.
  • Show up for them! Be mentally present, responsive, and empathetic - you would want the same in return.

Watch the video for more information and tips on how to enact these changes today! 

http://youtu.be/iG7GEpy6y7s

Share your experience- the good, the bad, and the ugly- in the comments section of the video or the blog.  Let's get the converstaion started around building a life you love!

Where's Your Head At?

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It's summertime! The warm weather, cool beverages, and long nights make us feel good and relaxed.

For the most part, that's a good thing! But too much can take you off your A-Game. Falling off your game can look like this:

- lack of motivation and drive

no clarity or direction

- stagnation and inaction towards goals

This upcoming month, I challenge you to make that different! I challenge you to make a commitment to yourself. I challenge you to get you head back in the game!

For the month of August, I'm offering the my introductory package at 1/2 price - $99- because I want you to make these positive changes for yourself!

This offer includes as assessment and 90-min session. At the end of your session, you will know exactly:

- What’s missing in your life

- What’s stealing your drive and motivation

- What’s causing lack of clarity and keeping you from moving forward

- What clouds your vision and prevents you from formulating an action     plan

- What you can start doing TODAY to achieve greater success

Check out my video to learn more about how to make this commitment to yourself!

http://youtu.be/PT9A14dDiNs

Sign up by emailing me, calling me, or sending a amessage in a bottle. Let me know you're ready for things to be different now!

3 Questions to Kick Out Self Doubt!

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Ever feel that wave of self doubt seep in just when you needed to be on your "A" game? Self doubt can get in between you and your happiness, goals, and success... but only if you let it!

I used to get sooo nervous when I would post a new blog or share a video. My self doubt would say, "No one's going to like it, your ideas are no good, and all your clients may leave you." Yuck! Why did I do that to myself?

Going outside of your comfort zone may be scary, but it's essential for your growth and personal development.

Your self doubt can serve you in these situations too - by reminding us to be more prepared and utilize knowledge from past experiences. But keep it in check!

Give your self doubt a reality check by asking yourself these 3 questions: 

- What's the worst case scenario?

- Is it likely to happen?

- What's my back up plan if it does happen?

What ways do you let self doubt into your life? What have you always wanted to do, but self doubt has held you back? Self doubt claims more dreams than failure ever will, but don't let yours be one of them!

Find out more ways to kick out self doubt as I spill my guts in in the video below!

Share your experience with self doubt, and what you did to tackle it in the comments section of the video! Hey - we can all learn a thing or two from each other, right?! What action steps did you take? And what changes did you see?

 

Work with me to find out even more ways you can make positive changes for your life and get want you really want! Check out the blog for more tips to be your best self and build a life you love! 

Be your best self,

Brittany

The best bad advice I’ve ever heard!

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I was lucky enough to go to New York City a few weeks ago and see the Book of Mormon on Broadway. Such a fantastic show in case you haven’t heard! Anyway, one of the songs really struck me, and I think it’s got to be the best bad advice I’ve ever heard: Turn in off!

See the lyrics for yourself:

You say you got a problem, well thats no problem, It's super easy not to feel that way!

When you start to get confused because of thoughts in your head, Don't feel those feelings! Hold them in instead

Turn it off, like a light switch just go click!”

 

Don’t feel those feelings?

Hold them in?

Turn it off?????

Although the song is clearly ridiculous and exaggerates, I think we (as in YOU and ME) think we can really handle our problems this way! Ever try to “shake” a bad feeling or thought? I think that’s the same as “turning it off”.

So what should you do instead?

Information is power! And there is tons of information in all those feelings, thoughts, and signals our body and brains send us all the time. Don’t turn those off! Listen to what they’re trying to say! You don’t necessarily have to follow through on all their suggestions. But the more information you have, more informed of a decision you can make!

Ever had a thought or feeling you couldn’t shake? What was the signal your body was trying to send you? How did you make use of that information instead?  Tell us all about it in the comments section below!

Happy healing,

Brittany

PS- see the full song here!

 

Vlog: Do Less to Get More

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jngXio4uriI No, that's not a typo! When you do less, you can get more of the things you really want in your life! Sometimes you have to get back down to your foundation in order to build a skyscraper.

Hear my examples in this vlog - and share yours below in the comments!

Ever "follow your dreams" in some way and find yourself overloaded with stuff you didn't think you'd be doing? Tell us why, and how you changed this!

Need help making this change for yourself? Contact me here!

3 Days!!

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I'm sure you're almost sick of hearing me talk about this! The Be Your Best Self seminar is only 3 days away! I couldn't be more excited to share all these tools for self care, stress management, and personal success!

People keep asking me "what will I get out of it?" What will you "get"? you that knows what you want, what you stand for, and how to create the very life you want. All the information is here. It's you that has to make the choice for change.

Find out more info or call for a free consult (401.441.1.626).

Seminar Countdown!

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With only 7 days until the start of the Build Your Best Self seminar, I wanted to do a 12-days of Christmas-isque countdown. See 6 and 7 below:

Day 7

There are 7 days in a week. Each day provides us with a new opportunity to focus our intention, find clarity in action, and pursue our greatest desires. What did you do in your last 7 days? Come join us to find your focus!

6 Days until the Build Your Best Self seminar:

Experts say we are all connected by 6 degrees of separation. But even with the people we already know, doesn't it feel like we're separated by even more? It can be really difficult to open up to the ones we love and speak our truth. We have fears of rejection, seeming needy, and feeling vulnerable. In order to Build Your Best Self, you need to rally the support of those in your life. You need to learn to communicate effectively, ask for what you need, and speak from the heart. Have trouble doing that? See you May 1st then.

Find out more information about the seminar on my vlog and email me at brittany.drozd@gmail.com!