Why do you keep blowing it?
Picture this:
You say "X". Your partner says "Y".
You both think "f*$k%sk#g" was said!
Ever had this kind of argument? Where neither of you can agree on what was said? Do you wonder how this is even possible since you both were in the room?
That's because you're MISSING communication.
I know what you're thinking- "no way, not me. I heard what she said."
Yeah, you heard the words. But did you really listen?
When you listen, your partner gives you ALL the information you need to fix the problem. For example...
"...You always walk away when I'm talking about this."
"...I always tell you thank you when you help me."
"...You never help me wash the dishes."
See those BOLDED words??? There's your answer!
- Don't walk away when she's talking.
- Say thank you when she helps you.
- Wash the damn dishes!
See how I did that right there? Just flip the words around!
Why are you missing these cues?
- You're defensive when you're arguing with your partner.
- You've decided you're right already. Why listen any further?
- You shut down when you don't like what you hear.
But missing these words is causing you more harm than good!
"Help Me fix this Brittany!" No problem!
Here's how you can REALLY hear your partner:
- Focus: Give your partner your undivided attention. Put all devices and distractions away. And yes, turn off the TV too!
- Body Language: 80% of communication is non-verbal. Look at how close she is to you, how her arms move, and the tone in her speech.
- Check for Clarity: "So what I hear you saying is that you'd like me to help with the dishes?"
What's in it for me?
Use these tips for a stress-free evening, romantic evening. Feel totally in sync with your partner. Get the kudos you want for how awesome you are!
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